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November 15, 2016
9:45 pm
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Separating from a twin flame, to my heart, is akin to losing your true soulmate in terms of pain.
Therefore, the five stages of grief seem adequate.

    I. Denial
       Forget what happened.
       Forget they exist, forget the impact.
       Your heart ceases to beat during this time,
       Sitting stone still in the hollow of your chest.
       Your body grows heavy from the exhaustion
       Of shutting it away in the back of your head.
       You spend too much time trying
       To file away the memories.
       You don’t cry again after the first day.
       You wish you did.
   II. Anger
       It’s not your fault,
       Push away the blame.
       Ignite the pit in your stomach
       And breathe fire to everyone you meet.
       This stage lasts longer
       Than you would prefer to admit.
       Let others fan the flames
       To keep them lit deep within you.
       You lose track of how much time has passed.
       Maybe it’s for the better.
       (It’s not.)
  III. Bargaining
       Stare at your phone.
       Stare at your phone.
       Stare at your phone.
       Do not pick up the phone.
       Do not pick up the phone.
       Do not look at the texts.
       Delete them.
       Delete them.
       Delete
       Don’t delete them.
       Maybe
       Someday
       If you
       If I
       What if
       Put the phone away.
       Revisit anger and denial.
       Curl up in the loneliness that they leave behind.
       Don’t look at your phone.
       Stop thinking about it.
   IV. Depression
       You start this stage four too early.
       It’s woven into your bones, strangling your veins.
       Dream about it.
       Dream about fixing things.
       Dream about them.
       Wake up feeling empty,
       Stare at the ceiling
       Whisper,
       “oh”
       Into the dark.
       Don’t cry.
       Close your eyes,
       Go back to sleep.
       Dream of nothing.
    V. Acceptance
       I’ll let you know when I get there.
       (someday)

If you were the catalyst, as I was,
Add another stage, somewhere between bargaining and acceptance.

   VI. Guilt
       Wither away
       in silence.
       Remember everything you did wrong.
       Imagine the ways you would apologize.
       Know that it’s pointless.
       Imagine anyways.

The following users say thank you to Ritski for this useful post:

c4a1g
Someday, I like to think. . .
November 17, 2016
9:48 pm
Calligrapher

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enjoyed the read a look into an emotion

 

pain held up to light

a view into a new world

shows old feelings rise 

December 19, 2016
2:42 am
Calligrapher

Points: 5162
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I was on reading this piece again

and kept thinking

the train of self thought in stages and

all the stages seem to blame self when

it is not self but at least 2

 

this piece reads like a person who

has lost the love of self

 

thank you for posting

craig

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