Maxillofacial Surgeon’s office today is a flamin understatement. My mouth feels as if a herd of drunken banshees had a hand grenade party in it........................ At forty nine I finally had to have a wisdom tooth taken out. Go figure, my wisdom never troubled me at a younger age. But due to wear I’ve been having problems with one and decided to have it removed before my trip to Wisconsin. Big mistake On my initial visit I was told, “ piece of cake extraction Mr. Steele.” Promise given by a doctor that had obviously been huffing his laughing gas. Or he has an upcoming payment on his yacht and that was the line to suck me in...........
At any rate, Murphy’s law went into effect approximately five minutes into the extraction procedure. Being in a chair having minor surgery on your mouth isn’t bad until you hear the words, “ We’re having a small problem and need to put you under.” You ‘ve dealt with everything like a good lil soldier and then BAM They come out with that crap. Put me under, WTF for? Expwain now pwease You wiar, you said piesh of cake and now pwobwem? Howy shik Umma stwangle someone.......... Drooling like a Hyena stealing the hind quarter of a lion kill and angrily awaiting an answer, I tried to rise out of the chair only to be stifled with a mask and Dr. Jerkyll saying “okay here we go.” And I went. Of f to lala land pissed off that my question had never been answered.
The pissed off quickly went away with going to sleep. Note to self........... get summa that stuff they put me out with............ Straight to the ocean. Not in a boat though. Nor a plane. Just kind of........ hovering. And I really dug hovering above the ocean in that anesthetized state. Much better than regular dream sequences. I’m thinking my state of high bled over into my dream and gave me intense pleasure I could damn near feel. And I was really getting the hover travel down when, “Mr. Steele can you hear me?” I was suddenly irritated hearing the Dr’s voice in my dream. “Everything’s just fine”........................ Nuhuh. It ain’t fine cause there’s no ocean. It ain’t fine cause I’m not hoverin no more. I stopped listening with the realization that I was not hovering over the ocean. I guess the Lights are on but nobody’s home look on my face gave the Doc his sign to shut up because he abruptly stopped talking and I was escorted out with a prescription and instructions for care and follow up date.
Now at midnight looking at the honey colored hue of my pain killer of choice (Bourbon because I don’t do pills). I am writing about something totally off track of my intended writing session for the day. I really wanted to dive into Thoughts and read what I’ve been missing of late............. I wanted to write a free verse poem of some magnitude to make me feel good...... I wanted to enjoy the writing that had been thoughtfully penned by you folks and act as though each poem I read were written for me................. I was robbed of my wishes for today by an exuberant elf with a title that enabled him to hurt me and steal my plans for the day. And I still have to pay the fuktard.......... Boy did I miss my calling. I’d have been a great maxillofacial surgeon. At least the part of the job where I told someone how easy their procedure would be......... then like Dr. Jerkyll did today, I’d eff it up and send em to dream land only to bring em around and make em realize that they’d just been effed over and the really pleasant dream they were having was about to be abruptly replaced by severe pain....................
A/N Because of my medicated state, I really did not give a rat's a$$ about punctuation and didn't even pay attention to spell check so I apologize in advance for errors........... deal with it I'm going to bed.
Thanks Princess. I'm a zero defect machine today. Minor pain, mainly headache from my pain meds............... I don't mind a trip to the dentist to keep the pearly whites nice. What I went through yesterday was just tragic............. wrecked my whole day. I now know that next time I have to visit a dental surgeon to give a warning on the consultation visit............. That being if there are any "problems" that aren't disclosed ahead of time then the lack of payment of the bill will reflect my feelings towards the ineptness of the surgeon..................... just sayin.....................
Thanks @craigb12 ......... To rant is to bitch according to my wife. I'd always excelled at bitching about things that displeased me, aggravated me, disgusted me....... You get the hint. I've gotten to be quite eloquent at cussing someone out without actually swearing at them........... I practice this in meetings or any time I have a presentation and some unitard pisses me off..........
When I got my bottom wisdom teeth out they gave me Valium for before I got there, laughing gas when I got there, then they gave me anesthesia to put me to sleep lol. I don't remember a thing.... I wouldn't wanna be awake and then something go wrong.... When I was young I had to have a tooth pulled while I was awake and the dentist crushed the tooth in pieces while it was coming out..... I hope I don't ever have to go back for the top wisdom teeth.....
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