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Lust for dust
October 6, 2014
4:04 am
Calligrapher

Points: 4978
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another piece of paradise was put into pockets

green leaves of trees hung down and turned brown

chemical-rain from mines open-pits

 

wild flower petals hung in their sockets

like ancient scrolls they burned in a dusty hot sun

another piece of paradise was put into pockets

 

 melted glitter made into trinkets and lockets

lives of a forest destroyed by the lust of one

chemical-rain from mines open-pits

 

countries protect their hoards with rockets

 bricks hidden in vaults guarded by the gun

another piece of paradise was put into pockets

 

known for how thin one could knock it

shaped and polished it sparkled like the sun

 chemical-rain from mines open-pits

 

telescopes witness the death of stars

microscopes witness the death of nature

another piece of paradise was put into pockets

chemical-rain from mines open-pits

October 6, 2014
9:37 pm
Moderator

Points: 11711
Thanked 228 times
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Well look at you! Writing a villanelle... and a lovely one at that. The lines you chose to repeat are so powerful and don't even feel repeated. That's the sign of a good villanelle. Uh-huh, I love this form and the metaphor here is bold, original, and perfect.

It also reminded me of one of my favorite Joni Mitchell tunes: .

For those of you not familiar with villanelles: http://www.poets.org/poetsorg/text/poetic-form-villanelle

Wine is bottled poetry. ~ Robert Louis Stevenson

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