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Wrong all Along
July 26, 2012
3:51 pm
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I feel like I didn't waste today,
but it doesn't matter because I know I'll waste tomorrow.
I feel like God gave me a chance,
but who cares? All I did was screw it up.
This is how I feel.
I don't expect you to like me,
I don't even like myself.
I don't want you to love me,
you're better off loving someone else.

I feel like things could get better,
but I know it never does.
Not for me....anyway,
'cause this is how it is.
I wish I could mean more to you,
but I'm simply not worth your time.
I wish I was more of a man,
but....I'm just a boy stricken blind

I'm hurting inside, drowning in self pity.
but then I close my eyes, and I see everything....
...everything I can't see past my fading world.

Like the memory of a friend,
saying I have so much to offer.
...
I'm sorry I said I didn't believe you.

The past suffocates me, there's so much I can say I've done.
What's WRONG with me? How can I feel so worthless?

"It doesn't make you less of a person"
is what I needed to hear.
...
Thank God you said it.

"I believe in you"
They say so much,
yet I never believed in myself.
...
Now that my chances are slowly dying,
I'm finally feeling like maybe all I need is one more

"You saved my life"
I still cry to the thought,
that you might be dead, if I wasn't there.
...
I don't know what I said,
but I'd never take it back.

"I think you're that kind of person"
When I said all I wanted was to make a difference.
It meant more then you know,
that it came from you.

So many people, saying so many things.
I know I should be grateful....
And this is how it is.

I'm worthless.
But I'm not
I'm a coward,
yet so unafraid.
I'm a monster,
and I care so much.
I have no heart,
but somehow I can love.

I'm vulnerable,
and I'm strong,
and somehow I was right,
but also wrong all along.

“I firmly believe that any man's finest hour, the greatest fulfillment of all that he holds dear, is the moment when he has worked his heart out in a good cause and lies exhausted on the field of battle - victorious”

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